Badges of a Modern Girl


Poetry



find your happy place/make it fuckin love you


ill be 48 in october

fine lines and wrinkles haven’t hit me yet but my knees ache and my toes pop everytime i move in any direction especially when i try to twist my ass or curl my hair my hands crack from battle wounds or maybe it’s old age bangin on the door trying to wake up my 30 year old mind which by the way was the best years of my life oh how i miss that sudden wisdom that connected by brain to my body that appreared at the ocean when i realized i could’nt swim or fucking breathe from all the smokin i had done in my youth that youth i still have that never sleeps and drinks and listens to pink flloyd when im sad and tired 

from time

yeah time

ill be 48 in october



published oct 2021  

                                                                                                             Chasing Shadows


                                                                             I yearn to find the old me

                                                                             endlessly peeping in places that 

                                                                             I shouldnt be. 


                                                             naked closets

                                                                    glommy alleys

                                                                            abandoned buildings


                                                                              Its eternally dark, slippery

                                                                              and drenched with misery.


                                                                               I see ghostly memories rise

                                                                               and fall like snapshot help up

                                                                               by invisible hands.


                                                                              The silhouette of the bloodied butcher

                                                                              flinging uneeded parts of me.


                                                                              I snached them up one by one

                                                                              for they are not worthless,

                                                                              they are my unfortnate memories. 

Published by AntiherionChick

Toxic Bloom

You leave behind a hue

A toxic bloom.

I want to know 

more about you,

your essence evokes me.

Makes me wanna see,

your deformities, your aches

learn all your mistakes.

I want to be everything 

you never knew.

I want to save you. 

Published by Athena Review

Glue​

I am lost soul glued to an immobile shadow

Eyes always closed,

If I open them its a 

horror I only know.

The smell of roses splashed with blood.

It's enough to lose my fading wit,

Ill never move on,

It stays with me 

like skin

to bone.


.

Published by Poetic Review

Havoc​

I

I walked out because she couldn't handle 

the tragic words spilling out of my mouth.

I didn't realize the magic to release my minds 

Havoc

Without a doubt,

I knew I said too much, my brain was telling me to stop

but my heart was telling me what's the rush?


I pause.


I have to realize not all are like me and can tell a story so

tragically,

yet gracefully.


We will never grow as humans if we continue to come to conclusions and have small minds.

Let's come up with, 

solutions, 

and have life transfusions

We can't fix mental well being if we can't even handle 

the meaning.

Life isn't always rainbows and halo's 

It can be void of tomorrows and gloomy tempos, fallen dominos 

and leave a fucked up afterglow. 

But, 

Isn't that how they make superheroes?






Li



Published by  Call and Response Journal 


Sunrise


I want to sit with you

Inhale and exhale you

I want you to make me

Whole again,

I want your liquid beams to

Sense me

Hold me

Stain me

After that,

I yearn to look

Back and know,

I can always bleed on you

When I’m blue.


Published by Ghost Heart Journal

Tattoo


There’s an emptiness

inside of me

I can never get back,

A place in time

I can't rewind.

It happened when I was barely nine.

Your massive white hands

on my tiny black body.

I have a blemish I can’t scrub off.

So again I plea,

Let go of me.

Your like a ghastly tattoo,

I’ll never get rid of you.

Published by Ghost Heart Journal

Self-love


It’s a powerful feeling and indeed freeing,

reaching deep inside your soul to find self-love

you will leave many behind.


You will start to decline sharing your space with 

people who don’t share the same state of mind.


Reaching for a higher love is never worthless;

in fact , it should be your purpose 

even if you’re the only one that take notice.


The moment your realize you’re enough, 

nothing else will matter.


You will be ready for new chapters

and even new disasters. 

Published by Call and Response Journal